Where went April?

I have no idea where the time is going. Last time I checked, it was March. Suddenly, it’s Easter. Hopefully my alternate self in whatever alternate universe swallowed me up is being productive.

I’ve mainly been doing some work: helping a friend, making decisions on the book, shuttering non-core businesses. Funny things have come up such as what name to use as a writer since the whole Jennifer Lawrence thing is getting a bit played out and even Larry and Sergey would have trouble finding me on Google Satya would have trouble finding me on Bing.

I honestly have no good excuse for my slackerly blogging habits. This past weekend was gorgeous outside and so, instead of writing, I spent some time getting the house ready for spring. The summer house is open once again and the porch is all set up for reading.

We brought out all our summer sporting equipment.

Of course, that’s why it snowed on Tuesday!

I just finished reading Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban to the kids and although I have read the series before, I was surprised how emotionally draining I found this book (which has always been my favourite) this time. The Dementors, paranormal sentries who keep Azkaban prison secure, are such an excellent metaphor for the darkness that can follow trauma: “…the Dementor will feed on you long enough to reduce you to something like itself… You’ll be left with nothing but the worst experiences of your life.” In the book, the defence against their darkness is to focus on the light: on good memories and, not surprisingly to many, chocolate. A terrific doc that I saw this week on Vision offers another solution: forgiveness. In To Forgive…Divine, filmmaker Hilary Pryor weaves together interviews with people who have forgiven terrible sins against themselves or their loved ones with an exploration of Christian, Buddhist, Islamic and Jewish approaches to forgiveness. Forgiveness is a way to avoid getting sucked into the darkness, but I have always found it a tricky thing. I know that it serves me best and yet somehow it feels like letting things go means that what happened doesn’t matter. Apparently, this is an incredibly common feeling, which is why forgiveness is an easier concept to preach than to practice. I think it’s easier to start small and work up. I’ve always loved the C.S. Lewis quote to which Anne Lamott refers in Travelling Mercies: “If we really want to learn forgiveness, perhaps we had better start with something easier than the Gestapo.” Amen to that.

As a complete departure from the bleakness, today I attended the Ladies’ Lunch at the club. I sported a spring-but-still-freezing ensemble of a black shirt, lace skirt and tall boots.

The lunch was the spring fashion show and I was strong-armed into modelling again. (I am so very much not a model that when I told someone I was going to try to channel Kate Moss on the runway, she thought I said I was going to channel Cake Boss on the runway. I bet Cara D never gets that kind of sass…) Nevertheless, the clothes were very pretty, made by a local Oakville designer Karoo. I’m thinking about getting this dress that I wore on the catwalk as it was pretty and comfortable (it’s named the Darling style: how darling!) Of course, then I’d for sure need to get tickets to Coachella next year! I’m loving that whole Boho thing right now.

Serena is still very mad that the club does not consider her enough of a lady to attend these lunches. She sulked all afternoon.

I’m more of a lady than you are! 

I hope you have a wonderful long weekend and that whatever holiday you are celebrating brings you a feeling of revitalization and peace.


  1. Forgiveness is very tricky. You want to just do it and move on but for the real biggies….I have found it is not a one time shot. The memory does not fade and some days the act has to be forgiven yet again. I jumped the gun and planted veggies this past beautiful week end..they're dead. Sigh.


  2. well I salute – we still can't get anywhere near our gazebo! I am still working away inside and it is very satisfying! Forgiveness is very hard to truly do. Forgiving oneself even more difficult. I forgive, but do not forget, since I always think that means I've lost the lesson. And then I do all I can to avoid the individual as much as I can. But it is very hard! You look beautiful and I like that darling dress myself! I was in a local shop and picked up two little dresses this week for a song – both very boho!


  3. Serena on the skateboard had me laughing out loud, what a character. I've been thinking about forgiveness lately as well, it's tough but necessary for growth. CS Lewis was right about so many things. Your spot looks lovely and I wish I belonged to that club of yours!Have a lovely Easter weekend.


  4. Wow, thank you for your thought-provoking discussion of forgiveness. It's something I've been working on, and have found extremely difficult. I tend to bracket it with “no regrets” and “walk away from recrimination,” also challenging. We had snow Tuesday night, a funny kind of emphatic, noisy snow, more little crystals than flakes. It sounded like someone was outside throwing pebbles at the window – on the 17th floor! Nevertheless, I didn't get back to sleep, and found my weary brain surrounded and fenced in by mental lists of must do, should do, should get someone else to do but who – oh, there are so many reasons I'll be glad to see the end of winter.


  5. You look fab in that outfit and I'm sure the dress looks darling on you. Of course Serena stole the post on her skateboard…but she knew that! It took me over a year to “forgive” the s*** who tried to effectively destroy my daughters life. Once I finally realized that my anger was giving him power over me, I was able to drop it like a stone. The turd didn't deserve any control over me or my feelings. Now that's not saying I'd cry at his funeral…I've moved on. xox


  6. That dress is darling on you!I am lucky in that the only things I've ever had to forgive are emotional or psychological insults, and time helps with those. Self-forgiveness, on the other hand, doesn't get any easier. (If you ever see me talking to myself in the street, I'll be giving myself a dressing-down for some past wrong. Or practising my Spanish …) Hope you've had a happy Easter!


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